hey everyone... its been a while... just wanted to write this down and be some kind of an announcement... im going back to work... wee.. woo....i cant really be excited about it either....
you guys probably didn't know about this... but i have been unemployed for the last 1 year and close to a half... due to my depression... i couldnt do a lot of stuff to the point where getting a job and going back to work is unfeasible... but recently ive been going to a psychiatrist and got medicated... since then my physical and mental state has been going up to the point where ive got to do a lot of stuff... including this websiteee... including work... ... ...probably
through my time counsouling for a year... i want to believe ive learned a lot... a lot so i dont make the same mistake again... a new state of mind... and tools to cut through challenges ahead... .... ...but there is still this instil trauma that i have regarding work and talking to people... this left over fear and anxiety thats currently haunting me to take another step .... am i pushing myself too hard?... or is it just my morning empty stomach talking....? yeah.. when i dont eat my anxiety built up and i couldnt really think straight... some funny tid bits about me dear reader... im.. gonna wait for my food....
(,,Ծ‸Ծ,, )
٩(^ᗜ^ )و
(ㅅ´ ˘ `)
(๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑)
okay.... phew... i think im better now... but... i think im still scared... im afraid ill mess up by saying the wrong thing... or... messing up when discussing salary... either shooting too high or too low... im afraid ill mess up again... couldnt keep up with the demand... or... letting my anxiety eating myself again... like... whats happening right now.... im scared...
*sigh*... but i know its irrational to think like that... theres no proof of me messing up again... at least for now... even if i mess up and things dont work out... i could just bail ... i ... need to know my limits... besides... my questions are valid... and a one sided agreement never work out at the end... ... i wrote down my questions ... so i sould be alright .... if watching delicious party precure have ever taught me.... its the first step that are scary .... and to remember whats important... (this is not a joke... these words are the only thing that keeping my from having a breakdown (ó﹏ò｡))
i.. thank you for reading dear reader... hope for me good luck... im still gonna upload stuff on this website dont you worry... im just gonna try to get some money for while... and having a good work life balance... like i wanted... if anyone is having the same kind of problem or anxiety as i am.... i wish us good luck... thats it for now...
ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ gambarou